May 272011
(I wanted to try a shot at a 100-word Drabble, as well as some horror. WARNING: This one is disgusting. Feel free to look away.)
Grin
I had to keep coughing to keep my mouth clear enough to breathe; my nose too stuffy.
She didn’t seem to struggle as much, show any pain, as she shoved each of my teeth into the holes where hers had been. Her smile was hitchy and catchy, to keep the pegs from falling out, smiling at me with my own teeth shoved into her grin. She fiddled with her former teeth on the table, wet and sticky and shiny maroon.
“Shee me?” sputtering little clots through her lips. “I’m pretty with your shmile in me.”
I passed out in pain.
Kind of gross, but not as bad as the gore films people have been throwing at me lately. Good effort on the drabble, Reginald.
Thanks John! Yeah, I’m no fan of gore for the sake of gore. If it’s an element in a comedy piece, or an element in a horror piece, fine, as long as it relates to something with purpose. This was fun to try, and I think I like the stolen smile concept here, and the gore is a necessary result. I might do more drabble, but not in place of the other; these feel too quick and gone to be satisfying (I suppose, unless, you’re doing these en masse for another purpose, ala Jake Bible).
Great use of 100 words, I am wondering if she may want to view the world through his eyes too.
Mmmm tasty! Writing this was frustrating, because I want to explain more of the why’s and wherefore’s here. Might have to revisit this in larger pieces.
A very visual 100 words! I could just picture her smiling at him with his teeth! I laughed at Steve’s suggestion that she may want to view the world through his eyes too – ewww infact ewww to the whole piece – but I loved it!
Thanks Helen! ewww indeed
LOVED IT!! Even giggling a little. Brilliant getting such a cringe factor across in so few words.
Added your #fridayflash tweet to our picks this week at http://vamplit.com/?p=3711
Thankyou WJ! Pleased that you liked it. Thanks for listing me at VampLit! You’re too kind.
[...] story, Grin, I had previously published here on my blog. The other two, Three Jack O’Lanterns, and Tug the Heart Strings, were first published at The [...]